Wednesday, March 4, 2009

A Contemplation..

It was 11.30 PM at one rainy night. A man was sitting on balcony of his rent apartment while staring into the rapidly descending path of water. He slowly slurped a glass of hot milk and then put the glass on the balcony wall. His minds flew back few years ago when he had read the hadith for the first time

Ali Bin Abi Talib, The Prophet's cousin and the husband of his daughter Fatimah reported that the during a funeral in what is now known as Jannat-ul-Baqi in Madinah, The Prophet PBUH (Peace Be Upon Him) approached the Companion and sat among them. He had a stick with him and he thoughtfully scratched the earth with it for a while, and then said,“There is not one amongst you for whom a seat in paradise or hell has not been allotted, and about whom it has not been written down whether he would be an evil person or a blessed person”. A companion asked,“Allah’s Messenger, should we not then depend on our destiny and abandon our deeds?” Thereupon, The Prophet PBUH replied,“Acts of everyone will be facilitated in that which has been created for him. So, whoever belongs to the company of the blessed will have good works made easier for him, and whoever belongs to the wretched ones will have evil acts made easier for him.”

The man stood still on the balcony and started questioning himself.

Would he be a part of company of the blessed?
or part of company of the wretched?

He was then contemplating about his destiny and his fate in the afterlife. Would it be like a "choose your own adventure" storybook? He smiled and remembered reading such a book in his boyhood. The book was different from ordinary children storybook. At certain point of the story, he must choose what the main character of the story would do. Would Pinocchio choose to go to the circus instead of going home? or would Pinocchio stayed aboard the ship instead of jump? (He only had Pinocchio in his collection of choose your own adventure book :P) Thus instead of linear storyline, it has multiple storyline and also multiple endings. Then he imagined about his own "choose your own adventure" that God had created for him. The difference is he couldn`t turn back into previous chapter if he had met an unsatisfactory ending..

Flash of memories were passing by inside his head. Some were good, some were bad, some put smile on his lips, some made him closed his eyes and wondering why on earth he had done it. He realized that too many sins he had made... Too many mistakes and blunders he had done.. Too many people had their feeling hurt by him

He felt gloomy.He didn`t know whether he`d be part of company of the blessed with such many sins...

"Khauf wal raja.... fear and hope..." He heard the sound from within himself

"It must be balanced, between fear and hope", he thought. "It is good to worry about my sin but I must try to be an optimist so that I could be better in the future", he talked to himself

He slowly recited the pray,

"God, forgive my sins in the past... It such a plenty of sins that brings me closer to the company of the wretched"

"Help me to distance myself from company of the wretched.. Grant me uneasiness if I close to doing sins"

"Help me to get closer to the company of the blessed.. Grant me easiness to do a good deeds"

"Yaa muqollibal qulub tsabit quluubana ala tho’atika. O, Allah, the turner of the hearts, turn my heart to Thine obedience"

Rain droplets were still falling from the dark cloudy sky.. Droplets by droplets fell as if they recite praises to God..

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